To my family and friends....that one day you may understand.
Just because I have gone through a faith crisis and no longer believe in the foundational claims of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormons) does not mean I dislike Mormons. I have Mormon heritage in my blood and will always be a cultural Mormon with interest in Mormon history. I feel daily sorrow for my family and friends that are still in the Mormon church which is the reason I created this web page. Knowone (including me) ever wants to be told they are wrong especially from someone they have little respect for. I find it extremely interesting that most of my family and friends put more trust in what their church leaders have to say than their family/friends. I have absolutely nothing to gain by my new beliefs and everything to loose, I have already lost a few friends. It is impossible for those in the Mormon church to know what it is like to be a faithful Mormon who has gone through a faith crisis that now has a crystal clear view of things from the outside looking in. When you are involved in an organization that in some way controls your behavior, information, thought, and emotion it makes it hard to see clearly. The below two links highlight most of the issues and reasons I have for leaving The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day saints. I highly recommend everyone reads one of these documents, I can guarantee you will learn something new regardless of how much you know about the Mormon church.
- CES letter.
As my family and most of my friends know I grew up in the LDS Church and once had a strong belief in the truthfulness of the gospel doing my best to live the teachings. I went on a two year mission to South Korea, read the scriptures from end to end many times, and prayed thousands of times.
In my mid 30's I became interested in the history of polygamy after reading a news article, one thing led to another and I finally started to really study church history. Growing up in the LDS Church I questioned some of the troubling aspects pointed out above but was able to resolve most of my concerns through reading church approved literature and talking with church leaders and my parents. I was told, and believed at the time, that I could not trust any of "evil outside sources" like www.mormonthink.com to get my church history information from which I now see as a BIG mistake and one I want others to avoid. After several months of studying everything started to make complete sense and fall into place like the missing pieces of a puzzle and I realized without a doubt that Joseph Smith did not restore the one and only true church. The peace and calm that I felt at that time was nothing like I have ever experienced before in my life but was exactly what I was looking for all of those years that I prayed. The conviction I now have in my beliefs is ten times stronger then when I was on a mission in Korea and very hard not to share with others.
Please don't think for a minute that this has been easy for me to learn the truth the way I have, I have been pushed away by friends because of my new beliefs. The past 9+ years have been hard in my life, I have experienced betrayal, loss, and sadness like I've never know.
A common misunderstanding is that droves of people now leaving the LDS Church is because they can't live up to the morals, values, and teachings when in reality these people are leaving the church because they have found the truth. You can read hundreds of first hand accounts of why faithful LDS members are leaving the church in record numbers at places like http://www.exmormon.org/stories.htm or http://mormonthink.com/personalstories.htm I use to be like most faithful LDS members and saw no point in reading literature that pointed out problems or untruths about the church because I thought it was all lies and would be waste my time when after all I knew the truth.
I realize my new beliefs are not popular and I would never jeopardize my family and friends relationships if I was not 100% sure in my new beliefs. I feel it would be crazy to bet my life, my time, my money, my heart, and my mind into an organization that has so many serious problems to its foundational truth claims, there are just way too many problems. If it was just a few issues then it could be overlooked but we're talking about dozens of serious issues that undermine the very foundation of the LDS Church and its truth claims. Faith is believing and hoping when there is little evidence for or against something, delusion is believing when there is an abundance of evidence against something.
I find it very interesting how faithful LDS members can be so full of pride that they are more willing to listen to what strangers have to say than their own relatives and friends that are truly looking out for you.
Please don't label me as anti-Mormon which implies that my criticism of the LDS Church stems from prejudice towards individuals, In no way do I want to take away all of the good that the LDS Church has brought into peoples lives. I grew up in the LDS Church and hold with me the morals and values I was taught and believe the true road to happiness is helping others, which believe it or not, is why I have written this.
Truth can't be stopped and will prevail in the end, especially in this information age we now live in where a wealth of information is available at your fingertips.
Love,
Scot
In my mid 30's I became interested in the history of polygamy after reading a news article, one thing led to another and I finally started to really study church history. Growing up in the LDS Church I questioned some of the troubling aspects pointed out above but was able to resolve most of my concerns through reading church approved literature and talking with church leaders and my parents. I was told, and believed at the time, that I could not trust any of "evil outside sources" like www.mormonthink.com to get my church history information from which I now see as a BIG mistake and one I want others to avoid. After several months of studying everything started to make complete sense and fall into place like the missing pieces of a puzzle and I realized without a doubt that Joseph Smith did not restore the one and only true church. The peace and calm that I felt at that time was nothing like I have ever experienced before in my life but was exactly what I was looking for all of those years that I prayed. The conviction I now have in my beliefs is ten times stronger then when I was on a mission in Korea and very hard not to share with others.
Please don't think for a minute that this has been easy for me to learn the truth the way I have, I have been pushed away by friends because of my new beliefs. The past 9+ years have been hard in my life, I have experienced betrayal, loss, and sadness like I've never know.
A common misunderstanding is that droves of people now leaving the LDS Church is because they can't live up to the morals, values, and teachings when in reality these people are leaving the church because they have found the truth. You can read hundreds of first hand accounts of why faithful LDS members are leaving the church in record numbers at places like http://www.exmormon.org/stories.htm or http://mormonthink.com/personalstories.htm I use to be like most faithful LDS members and saw no point in reading literature that pointed out problems or untruths about the church because I thought it was all lies and would be waste my time when after all I knew the truth.
I realize my new beliefs are not popular and I would never jeopardize my family and friends relationships if I was not 100% sure in my new beliefs. I feel it would be crazy to bet my life, my time, my money, my heart, and my mind into an organization that has so many serious problems to its foundational truth claims, there are just way too many problems. If it was just a few issues then it could be overlooked but we're talking about dozens of serious issues that undermine the very foundation of the LDS Church and its truth claims. Faith is believing and hoping when there is little evidence for or against something, delusion is believing when there is an abundance of evidence against something.
I find it very interesting how faithful LDS members can be so full of pride that they are more willing to listen to what strangers have to say than their own relatives and friends that are truly looking out for you.
Please don't label me as anti-Mormon which implies that my criticism of the LDS Church stems from prejudice towards individuals, In no way do I want to take away all of the good that the LDS Church has brought into peoples lives. I grew up in the LDS Church and hold with me the morals and values I was taught and believe the true road to happiness is helping others, which believe it or not, is why I have written this.
Truth can't be stopped and will prevail in the end, especially in this information age we now live in where a wealth of information is available at your fingertips.
Love,
Scot
1 comment:
Hey Scotty. Reading through this history you've compiled I'm reminded of my own LDS history and the many times doubt and turmoil crept in but it couldn't penetrate that thick wall of indoctrination I'd been coated with. It's like paint. You get one layer, then another and another until one day you are sitting there in Sacrament Meeting and you can't breathe. That's what it was like for me. After 4 decades of "paint". I finally got the courage to start peeling some of that paint off. Then some more...and more. It takes years to get the paint off and even after it's all off you still smell the residue. Then one day it's gone and your are whole again feeling free. for some the first time in their life.I think your blog is going to help a lot of people.
Paul Wake
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